i am very upset. not just upset. angry - mad – want to smash you in the face until your head no longer stick again on your neck !
i swear - i'll rape you - so nasty and wild with my evil torturing way – treat you like a bitch - i swear i will! i'll do it without mercy – i don't care if you scream to death for that ! i'm very mad ! fuck !!
Those are awesome words, seriously... I love it... Fuckin love it...
A Short Ritual For Our Loving Friend
| Labels: cerpen bahasa inggris | 0 comments
I was at Rouen’s chamber yesterday. We’re still waiting friends to come. They said they would come and start a ritual, to cure one of our wounded friends. I arrived early in the chamber. I saw him there, couldn’t move, but could talk well. What he asked first was my condition. He always wanted to know that. To know what I feel and where I have been. He is the only one who admitted truly about my human reality hatred. He always says to me to keep it up because it is impossible that we could gather our life with them, the human.
I don’t know where to start to write a little about him. He is different. He is the one who could break the spell and safe from harm.
“We have not met each other a little while,” he said. He couldn’t get up from his bed because he’s too weak.
“Yes,” I nodded. “How are you feeling, Rouen?”
“Weak. Did you make friends with them?” He meant the human.
“I’m not interested. Real world and humanity are still not too precious to me,” I said.
“You better stay human sometimes, you’re still young,” he took a deep breath. “I don’t have a power to get up to burn those incenses. Would you please?”
“OK.” I turned on the incenses in every corner of the room, with a different kind of fragrance.
15 minutes later, I heard steps. Zardaz came. He took a deep breath and sat down beside me. Well, Zardaz is always 20 years old in my vision and everyone. “I do not want to be late, the dawn is very terrifying as like you stick the torch straight to my face and burn my skin,” he looked at me suspicious. “You would not do that, would you, Shar?”
I shook my head, and then asked him; “How many of you will come to this room?”
He said, there would not be many, and he stated that a rebellious virja xotev like me deserve more friends like our kind to stay away from human social life and human reality.
“They will arrive soon. I can smell them from here,” Rouen guessed with eyes closed. Well, not just guessed. He’s damn right to say the name of our friends who would come that night.
“Well, Rouen. How weak you are, you still got it. The hidden power in your soul,” Zardaz said proudly.
About 10 minutes, they all came.
“I am sorry, we’re late,” they all said together. That’s amazing.
“No problem to be late. I’d be thankful to all of you, you finally come here in this darkened room,” Rouen replied.
“I don’t really like the smell of your chamber, Rouen. It’s very girly,” Duza said. I could have nearly age in the vision, just like Duza.
“What have you done with the room?” Duza asked me.
“Rouen wanted me to burn some incenses. What do you mean very girly?”
“Sick smelly flowering thing that come from those human girls, that’s what I mean,” he answered.
“If you trying to say that I’m also smell like those girls, you’re damn wrong,” I said harsh.
“Bah! Listen, Shar! You should change your name, that’s my name you use and you smell like those rats in the basement!” Duza would probably start a fight.
“What did you say?!” I’m kind of pissed off.
“Hey, I love the smell and the freshness here. Very naturist,” Mori said and then grinned at Duza. Mori loves fruity smell.
“What I’m trying to say is…”
“Don’t say, Duza. You were saying that Shar smells like grape fruit, not rats, but he didn’t know how to say it right,” Mori cut his words, huddle up my shoulder, placed my head on his shoulder and stick his nose to me neck. “Shar, you smell good.”
“You two! No bounding in this chamber, god damn alien sick bastards!” Duza shouted at me and Mori.
Zardaz laughed, “Well, nobody gives a fuck about Duza the stupid alien or what words coming from him, that’s why he never stop to get some attention. Maybe someone has to steal his ship and make him cry. What’s the big deal if every place smells like shit anyway? Do you get my point here, alien boy? Today is to safe Rouen.”
“Arrogant wild ugly alien devil is also trying to get attention here. I’ll knock you down soon. And you smell like those rats in the grave!” Duza yelled at Zardaz.
“I’ll kill you right away, stupid alien clown! Cut your throat and throw your head away from your body!”
“No can do, ugly alien devil! I’ll eat your heart first before you do that!”
“Do it now!” Zardaz said angrily. He landed a very hard laser punch straight to Duza’s face and the fight had just begun…
“Duza! Zardaz! Cut it out!” Mori tried to give them warning. “There’s no way to discuss unimportant conversation ended with fight here, at Rouen’s chamber. Do some respect please, both of you,” Mori tried to stop the conversation before our mouth fighting each other swearing nasty words.
“Fuck off, you alien sick bastard!” Duza yelled at Mori.
“Shit, please stop all of you,” Rouen said calmly. And then they all stop.
At last, we all gathered, sitting close to Rouen and face to each other. Rouen offered to all of us, who want to start first? He needs it from all of us, badly, reminding that time he was not healthy and losing some power.
“Not you, Shar. You are not the first.” Mori said to me.
Mori was the one who did it first. He cut his flesh and gave it to Rouen. And then the other started to join him, did the same thing, let Rouen ate our flesh. I was the last one. We could see how Rouen turned out to be better after that. The changing of his pale skin to healthy skin, red blushes on his face… and then, faster moves. It’s like a miracle. He suddenly got up from his bed and looked pretty fresh.“Be thankful to what you have got. You have saved me from hell and take me to heaven. Thanks a million,” he thanked to everybody, gave each of us a hug.
I don’t know where to start to write a little about him. He is different. He is the one who could break the spell and safe from harm.
“We have not met each other a little while,” he said. He couldn’t get up from his bed because he’s too weak.
“Yes,” I nodded. “How are you feeling, Rouen?”
“Weak. Did you make friends with them?” He meant the human.
“I’m not interested. Real world and humanity are still not too precious to me,” I said.
“You better stay human sometimes, you’re still young,” he took a deep breath. “I don’t have a power to get up to burn those incenses. Would you please?”
“OK.” I turned on the incenses in every corner of the room, with a different kind of fragrance.
15 minutes later, I heard steps. Zardaz came. He took a deep breath and sat down beside me. Well, Zardaz is always 20 years old in my vision and everyone. “I do not want to be late, the dawn is very terrifying as like you stick the torch straight to my face and burn my skin,” he looked at me suspicious. “You would not do that, would you, Shar?”
I shook my head, and then asked him; “How many of you will come to this room?”
He said, there would not be many, and he stated that a rebellious virja xotev like me deserve more friends like our kind to stay away from human social life and human reality.
“They will arrive soon. I can smell them from here,” Rouen guessed with eyes closed. Well, not just guessed. He’s damn right to say the name of our friends who would come that night.
“Well, Rouen. How weak you are, you still got it. The hidden power in your soul,” Zardaz said proudly.
About 10 minutes, they all came.
“I am sorry, we’re late,” they all said together. That’s amazing.
“No problem to be late. I’d be thankful to all of you, you finally come here in this darkened room,” Rouen replied.
“I don’t really like the smell of your chamber, Rouen. It’s very girly,” Duza said. I could have nearly age in the vision, just like Duza.
“What have you done with the room?” Duza asked me.
“Rouen wanted me to burn some incenses. What do you mean very girly?”
“Sick smelly flowering thing that come from those human girls, that’s what I mean,” he answered.
“If you trying to say that I’m also smell like those girls, you’re damn wrong,” I said harsh.
“Bah! Listen, Shar! You should change your name, that’s my name you use and you smell like those rats in the basement!” Duza would probably start a fight.
“What did you say?!” I’m kind of pissed off.
“Hey, I love the smell and the freshness here. Very naturist,” Mori said and then grinned at Duza. Mori loves fruity smell.
“What I’m trying to say is…”
“Don’t say, Duza. You were saying that Shar smells like grape fruit, not rats, but he didn’t know how to say it right,” Mori cut his words, huddle up my shoulder, placed my head on his shoulder and stick his nose to me neck. “Shar, you smell good.”
“You two! No bounding in this chamber, god damn alien sick bastards!” Duza shouted at me and Mori.
Zardaz laughed, “Well, nobody gives a fuck about Duza the stupid alien or what words coming from him, that’s why he never stop to get some attention. Maybe someone has to steal his ship and make him cry. What’s the big deal if every place smells like shit anyway? Do you get my point here, alien boy? Today is to safe Rouen.”
“Arrogant wild ugly alien devil is also trying to get attention here. I’ll knock you down soon. And you smell like those rats in the grave!” Duza yelled at Zardaz.
“I’ll kill you right away, stupid alien clown! Cut your throat and throw your head away from your body!”
“No can do, ugly alien devil! I’ll eat your heart first before you do that!”
“Do it now!” Zardaz said angrily. He landed a very hard laser punch straight to Duza’s face and the fight had just begun…
“Duza! Zardaz! Cut it out!” Mori tried to give them warning. “There’s no way to discuss unimportant conversation ended with fight here, at Rouen’s chamber. Do some respect please, both of you,” Mori tried to stop the conversation before our mouth fighting each other swearing nasty words.
“Fuck off, you alien sick bastard!” Duza yelled at Mori.
“Shit, please stop all of you,” Rouen said calmly. And then they all stop.
At last, we all gathered, sitting close to Rouen and face to each other. Rouen offered to all of us, who want to start first? He needs it from all of us, badly, reminding that time he was not healthy and losing some power.
“Not you, Shar. You are not the first.” Mori said to me.
Mori was the one who did it first. He cut his flesh and gave it to Rouen. And then the other started to join him, did the same thing, let Rouen ate our flesh. I was the last one. We could see how Rouen turned out to be better after that. The changing of his pale skin to healthy skin, red blushes on his face… and then, faster moves. It’s like a miracle. He suddenly got up from his bed and looked pretty fresh.“Be thankful to what you have got. You have saved me from hell and take me to heaven. Thanks a million,” he thanked to everybody, gave each of us a hug.
Old Activity
| Labels: stress | 0 comments
Yay, one thing is reminding me a lot about my activities that left behind.
I don`t forget about the nature and other living creatures thoo. I never do it lately just becuz of what? I am more seeing and meeting people lately and that makes me forget about enjoying the moment with nature.
Last time was... I had time sitting in balcony cuz the weather outside was vvv hot. I looked at the full moon about 1 and a half hours, felt the wind blows, hearing the sound all around in the night, not so crowded thoo. It`s not crowded, but the sound of night creatures were calming... Just feel it... I enjoyed it, really... It`s not just that, but I did close my eyes for some minutes and felt the air around me too, gathered with the nature of night... Feel so good...
For me, doing that is more fun then hanging out with friends, that`s how I feel...
"Other people might think that it`s a stupid thing to do." I think it`s not stupid. It`s help me to relaxing a bit. To calm down and refresh my mind. I also believe if the moon or the stars or the sun can give us power when we look at it and feel it with much attention we could ever feel it deep inside. Probably you think that it so stupid, but not.
Nyway...
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006!!!!
I`ll be at home and not going anywhere tonight cuz, I`m sure that quiet perfect joint and relaxing is the best way to do this year ;)
I don`t forget about the nature and other living creatures thoo. I never do it lately just becuz of what? I am more seeing and meeting people lately and that makes me forget about enjoying the moment with nature.
Last time was... I had time sitting in balcony cuz the weather outside was vvv hot. I looked at the full moon about 1 and a half hours, felt the wind blows, hearing the sound all around in the night, not so crowded thoo. It`s not crowded, but the sound of night creatures were calming... Just feel it... I enjoyed it, really... It`s not just that, but I did close my eyes for some minutes and felt the air around me too, gathered with the nature of night... Feel so good...
For me, doing that is more fun then hanging out with friends, that`s how I feel...
"Other people might think that it`s a stupid thing to do." I think it`s not stupid. It`s help me to relaxing a bit. To calm down and refresh my mind. I also believe if the moon or the stars or the sun can give us power when we look at it and feel it with much attention we could ever feel it deep inside. Probably you think that it so stupid, but not.
Nyway...
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006!!!!
I`ll be at home and not going anywhere tonight cuz, I`m sure that quiet perfect joint and relaxing is the best way to do this year ;)
Rowdysim
| Labels: my song lyrics | 0 comments
Ult-Junk
We're comin peace
No social jealousy
No Blackmail industry
The pure solution is the best for all
We ain't bullshitting you
So stop the bullshit
Friends together til the end
No more hurting each other
Other wise, we never better
Fuck!
Bring the peace
Brave your fucking soul
Bend over
Respect
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
Look at you people
Do you still have the cheaty mind in your fucking head?
How does the social jealousy infected your path?
You will never feel better when you get up from your bed
Because of what?
Because of you have no respect to your society side
Because you're still have nothing now and then
Do you think you're better and bigger huh?
You're still nothing but a shit fuck trash just like us
Wake up! Get concious!
This community will no longer be better if you can't stop collecting the mess
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
Fuckers
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
Speak up right when they want you to repeat your speech
Don't put the blame on anybody who doesn't understand anything
Don't jugde someone as a criminal if you don't understand the real fact is
That's too bad! That's too bad! That's too fucking bad!
Stop believing the news from those people who don't know the real problem, fuckers!
You're still nothing but a shit fuck trash just like us
Wake up! Get concious!
This community will no longer be better if you can't stop collecting the mess
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
Fuckers
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
We're comin peace
No social jealousy
No Blackmail industry
The pure solution is the best for all
We ain't bullshitting you
So stop the bullshit
Friends together til the end
No more hurting each other
Other wise, we never better
Fuck!
Bring the peace
Brave your fucking soul
Bend over
Respect
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
Look at you people
Do you still have the cheaty mind in your fucking head?
How does the social jealousy infected your path?
You will never feel better when you get up from your bed
Because of what?
Because of you have no respect to your society side
Because you're still have nothing now and then
Do you think you're better and bigger huh?
You're still nothing but a shit fuck trash just like us
Wake up! Get concious!
This community will no longer be better if you can't stop collecting the mess
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
Fuckers
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
Speak up right when they want you to repeat your speech
Don't put the blame on anybody who doesn't understand anything
Don't jugde someone as a criminal if you don't understand the real fact is
That's too bad! That's too bad! That's too fucking bad!
Stop believing the news from those people who don't know the real problem, fuckers!
You're still nothing but a shit fuck trash just like us
Wake up! Get concious!
This community will no longer be better if you can't stop collecting the mess
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
You keep it grow
Fuckers
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Shit!
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! (Say what?)
Clean this mess! Fuck!
Play (Drug Addict)
| Labels: short audio drama | 0 comments
DRUKAMICA
download:
http://www.mediafire.com/?qglnymftvt6zhra
or
http://www.mediafire.com/?0taalh5eg7ja74a
TRANSLATION
Recorded stuff, a conversation, and very strange really. I listened to the conversation over and over and then I have nightmares. It was make me unhappy.
OK translation :
Today I feel the cold again.
All body.
And weaker.
Maybe the drug makes your body cold.
You stop and have not used it for 5 days.
Don't you know that I don't like this? You don't understand it.
It feels like... no power at all. Sometimes I can't sleep either.
I feel sick too when I eat something too.
If I take it again now maybe everything back to normal, like a very healthy person, do not need to lay in bed for days.
I'm so sick being a stupid in here, I want to go out.
Wait until you feel well and then you can go out right?
I want to go out now and take drugs.
If go out now and take drug everybody will freak out again, like yesterday.
Beside, more to take is not good and next is can't get out from the drug institution.
Last night Papa talked to me many things.
He said he will send me to the hospital right away.
Maybe Papa's right you have to go there, that's better.
Would it be better treatment?
Doctors, clean place, better treatment, I don't care.
You so stupid. Just do it the right a way without complaining all the time.
In the other way maybe...
Ooh... you would buy drugs again in case we don't watch.
That's a shame.
You know, I can use a little to stop using drugs, and I think, it is the only way for me, that's the best way to stop it.
Probably I will... quit slowly.
Ha! Quit slowly...
That's so stupid.
It is the same with you still use it and not stop.
Next would be the best way to...
Die.
You record this?
Sorry, sorry...
download:
http://www.mediafire.com/?qglnymftvt6zhra
or
http://www.mediafire.com/?0taalh5eg7ja74a
TRANSLATION
Recorded stuff, a conversation, and very strange really. I listened to the conversation over and over and then I have nightmares. It was make me unhappy.
OK translation :
Today I feel the cold again.
All body.
And weaker.
Maybe the drug makes your body cold.
You stop and have not used it for 5 days.
Don't you know that I don't like this? You don't understand it.
It feels like... no power at all. Sometimes I can't sleep either.
I feel sick too when I eat something too.
If I take it again now maybe everything back to normal, like a very healthy person, do not need to lay in bed for days.
I'm so sick being a stupid in here, I want to go out.
Wait until you feel well and then you can go out right?
I want to go out now and take drugs.
If go out now and take drug everybody will freak out again, like yesterday.
Beside, more to take is not good and next is can't get out from the drug institution.
Last night Papa talked to me many things.
He said he will send me to the hospital right away.
Maybe Papa's right you have to go there, that's better.
Would it be better treatment?
Doctors, clean place, better treatment, I don't care.
You so stupid. Just do it the right a way without complaining all the time.
In the other way maybe...
Ooh... you would buy drugs again in case we don't watch.
That's a shame.
You know, I can use a little to stop using drugs, and I think, it is the only way for me, that's the best way to stop it.
Probably I will... quit slowly.
Ha! Quit slowly...
That's so stupid.
It is the same with you still use it and not stop.
Next would be the best way to...
Die.
You record this?
Sorry, sorry...
Technically DnB
| Labels: harian | 0 comments
It`s pretty fun went to the Drum&Bass party. The music was absolutely kickin ass fo good!!! Drinkin, smokin weeduh, jumpin. hushaushuahsuhausa. It`s cool hang out with some friends, I admit. Vvv cool. I really enjoy it. I think, it was cool cuz it`s with the music. Honestly, I was pretty strange there. Yup right, there were some friends, but when I`m around em, I don`t know why I feel vvv different. What`s the different? Dunno. Just different OK??? I`m different. I think I`m not good, and they all good. And they seemed strange to... the way they looked @ me.
Hey hey hey!!! It was a great party!!! OK???
Smile, smile... :))))))))
Hey hey hey!!! It was a great party!!! OK???
Smile, smile... :))))))))
Unexpected Reunion
| Labels: cerpen bahasa inggris | 0 comments
I felt a cold breeze last night. Rainy season begin, and the rain didn’t stop everyday. I hope next month will be no rain again. I feel cold for a long time. The air was very cold. As usual, I sat on the top of the tallest building in the city, doing my stupid activity, the day dreaming.
The weather was very cold. I never thought that, the night was like the coldest winter seemed happen forever. Suddenly, the wind blew. That’s not the wind, but something. Something familiar, smelled like an old friend. I turned around. I tried to open my ear, so I can hear clearly what was going on around. I walked closer to the tip of the building. I saw the empty street, no one was there. And then, I turned around again. There’s someone I recognize, coming to me. He landed smoothly, smiled at me.
“Sorry to bother you,” he said.
“Hey, not at all,” I replied. He weakened his wings and degraded it a little. “What happened to your wings? It looks…”
“My wings changed colour. Silver is cool, don’t you think?” he smiled at me again, I smiled back. And then I heard a plop sound. His wings had gone of hide. He looked like a normal human after that.
I saw his shinning eyes. I didn’t notice how he could be in this place, found me here. He’s still the same with the last time I met him, looking fresh as always.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
He came in to the right time and the right place that night. I would explain to him what’s going on.
“I think I should move out,” I said.
“I see,” he said, and then he stood up, picked a cigarette. “Moving out?” he asked, gave me the cigarette, and lighted it up after I put it in my mouth.
“Thanks,” I said. “Yep. Moving out.”
“Why?” he asked me again.
“I smell danger around here and this place is no longer save for me, or us?” I replied.
“I found our friends died in the woods,” he said. “They must have been doing some autopsy to them before they threw them in the woods. And the other else must be kept in the hidden places.”
We’re silent for a while.
“How’s the Moesha?” I started new conversation. I hope it’s not the wrong question. If I ask him something, my first question is about him and his kind, Moesha’s breed.
“Fine, like always,” he said.
We’re silent for a while again, and then he started to talk, “I think we should stop writing something about us on the internet. It would convince everybody that we exist. What do you think?”
I smiled. “Hey, the internet is bullshit, though. They thought it’s a made up story, you know that? Are you trying to stop me doing that thing?”
“No, do what you want to do. We’re free to do anything we want. We have suffered enough dealing all of our problems and pretending what we’ve been writing is just made up stories,” he took a deep breath.
“They won’t find us, would they?” I asked.
“They won’t find us,” he said so unsure.
The weather was very cold. I never thought that, the night was like the coldest winter seemed happen forever. Suddenly, the wind blew. That’s not the wind, but something. Something familiar, smelled like an old friend. I turned around. I tried to open my ear, so I can hear clearly what was going on around. I walked closer to the tip of the building. I saw the empty street, no one was there. And then, I turned around again. There’s someone I recognize, coming to me. He landed smoothly, smiled at me.
“Sorry to bother you,” he said.
“Hey, not at all,” I replied. He weakened his wings and degraded it a little. “What happened to your wings? It looks…”
“My wings changed colour. Silver is cool, don’t you think?” he smiled at me again, I smiled back. And then I heard a plop sound. His wings had gone of hide. He looked like a normal human after that.
I saw his shinning eyes. I didn’t notice how he could be in this place, found me here. He’s still the same with the last time I met him, looking fresh as always.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
He came in to the right time and the right place that night. I would explain to him what’s going on.
“I think I should move out,” I said.
“I see,” he said, and then he stood up, picked a cigarette. “Moving out?” he asked, gave me the cigarette, and lighted it up after I put it in my mouth.
“Thanks,” I said. “Yep. Moving out.”
“Why?” he asked me again.
“I smell danger around here and this place is no longer save for me, or us?” I replied.
“I found our friends died in the woods,” he said. “They must have been doing some autopsy to them before they threw them in the woods. And the other else must be kept in the hidden places.”
We’re silent for a while.
“How’s the Moesha?” I started new conversation. I hope it’s not the wrong question. If I ask him something, my first question is about him and his kind, Moesha’s breed.
“Fine, like always,” he said.
We’re silent for a while again, and then he started to talk, “I think we should stop writing something about us on the internet. It would convince everybody that we exist. What do you think?”
I smiled. “Hey, the internet is bullshit, though. They thought it’s a made up story, you know that? Are you trying to stop me doing that thing?”
“No, do what you want to do. We’re free to do anything we want. We have suffered enough dealing all of our problems and pretending what we’ve been writing is just made up stories,” he took a deep breath.
“They won’t find us, would they?” I asked.
“They won’t find us,” he said so unsure.
Placebo Cover - I Know
| Labels: my cover song | 0 comments
Yup here it is, my Placebo Cover - I Know...
My Remix Global
| Labels: my remix | 0 comments
Blackout VS Oxide & Neutrino - Hey Mr. DJ VS No Good
BT - Force Of Gravity (Sojourn & Charly's Midnight Outro Mix)
Eminem - Cleaning Out My Closet (Devilicia Project Remix)
Inner City - Good Life (Labuena Vida en Notas Mix Plus)
Kai Tracid - Too Many Times (Trance & Acid Suicide Mix)
Kai Tracid - Voyager (Wrong Remix)
Michael Jackson - Don't Stop Til Get Enough (Trip On Liquid Mix)
Nine Inch Nails - Only (Skatercat Mix)
Paul Van Dyk - Seven Ways (Kernkraft Mix)
The Prodigy - Voodoo People (Storm Mix)
Zoot Woman - Automatic (Blaumond Remix)
You The Only One Who Can Give Me The Air So I Can Breathe
| Labels: my mp3, my song lyrics | 0 comments
I could never get away
A never ending the lover's game
And I stay here all the day
Wishing all the things away
I just want to fly
Follow my mind
Only you, I have to find
Everything about you, blowin` my mind
I just want to go to where you are
But it`s just a cloudy day
You don't even see me there
I really don't know where
Which way
I can't pull these things away
Here comes, the rain
Then I think of you again
You're the only one who can give me the air so I can breathe
I will always love you, want you to reply so I won`t cry
You're the only one who can give me the light so I won't die
You're the only one, I will always love you
I will always love you
You're the only one
earlier version
acoustic version
band version
A never ending the lover's game
And I stay here all the day
Wishing all the things away
I just want to fly
Follow my mind
Only you, I have to find
Everything about you, blowin` my mind
I just want to go to where you are
But it`s just a cloudy day
You don't even see me there
I really don't know where
Which way
I can't pull these things away
Here comes, the rain
Then I think of you again
You're the only one who can give me the air so I can breathe
I will always love you, want you to reply so I won`t cry
You're the only one who can give me the light so I won't die
You're the only one, I will always love you
I will always love you
You're the only one
earlier version
acoustic version
band version
Been Bullied
| Labels: stress | 0 comments
They had bullied me and I lost 2 millions. Damn!!! And my brother was a part of it...
DAMN!
DAMN!
Wreck It
| Labels: my song lyrics | 0 comments
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
Boys and girls don`t cry
I am a fucking guy
I bring it other way
Your world to the Bi
Got the balls on me
You gotta give me greet
You`re the day on meat
You gonna miss the bleed
You know that I...
That I meet you thoo
Gotta know what's here
You gotta love me
You could damned in here
You dumb, I`m a gay
You know that me...
It`s me me me
You gotta know
I`m the man infront
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
Boys and girls don`t cry
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
Boys and girls don`t cry
I am a fucking guy
I bring it other way
Your world to the Bi
Got the balls on me
You gotta give me greet
You`re the day on meat
You gonna miss the bleed
You know that I...
That I meet you thoo
Gotta know what's here
You gotta love me
You could damned in here
You dumb, I`m a gay
You know that me...
It`s me me me
You gotta know
I`m the man infront
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
This time, I wanna show you who I am
This time, you know what kind of man I am
This time, I don`t wanna lie again
Boys and girls don`t cry
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
On the fire, wreck it!
Unfinished Journey
| Labels: cerpen bahasa inggris | 0 comments
I never feel it. Time after time, year by year, all pass by and I never change a bit. I think I’m just a lonely creature. Very lonely, and always want to be alone.
Last night I was on the top of the Tower, watching the city sides. A quiet crowded. From up there, I could see the people walking pass by the streets, very clear, with my magical eyes I have. Even If I want to jump from the tower, I would do it happily. And I would land down there smoothly. I can fly like a bird. Fly to where ever I want. I can move fast, and human eyes can’t catch me.
I looked at those small humans down there! I’m glad I could still respect them, not like my other kind. Sometimes I help humans. My friends always think that I’m stupid and dumb. They never agree if I give them much attention and taking care of human’s business. I think I did great so far, that’s not wrong. There are so many of our kinds living around human. Sharing or gathering, or mind their business, for me is the normal thing to do. As long as I don’t have problem to handle them, it doesn’t mind.
“We will close soon, boy,” the security guy spoke to me. “You’re not running away from home aren’t you?”
I only shook my head without words. If I could, I could finish him right on time there, shock him to death. But I’m not in the mood. I took the elevator and went down, left the Tower. I walked to the avenue.
I walked far, passed through the city library, and finally reached the next park. At that time, I heard the animal sounds. I was not far from the zoo. Shock the animal to death sounded fun. Maybe that would make me calm. Animal’s flesh isn’t having the same taste with human’s flesh. Not as good as it.
I zapped to the pool, moved fast through the gate. It’s almost dawn and that place was very quiet like a dead park with only low lighting. I watched the Dolphin Pool. It’s not in the inside and pretty big. I dug down on the other side of the pool. And then I saw a dolphin swim right through me. I put my hands in the water to touch it.
“Do you want me to shock you to death?” I asked the dolphin.The dolphin replied with whistle. It’s not bad talking with the animal. Sometimes I feel like they know what I’m saying. See, animal is not like human. I think they are more mellow compare to them. Well, of course they don’t want me to shock them to death. I asked them a stupid question.
Last night I was on the top of the Tower, watching the city sides. A quiet crowded. From up there, I could see the people walking pass by the streets, very clear, with my magical eyes I have. Even If I want to jump from the tower, I would do it happily. And I would land down there smoothly. I can fly like a bird. Fly to where ever I want. I can move fast, and human eyes can’t catch me.
I looked at those small humans down there! I’m glad I could still respect them, not like my other kind. Sometimes I help humans. My friends always think that I’m stupid and dumb. They never agree if I give them much attention and taking care of human’s business. I think I did great so far, that’s not wrong. There are so many of our kinds living around human. Sharing or gathering, or mind their business, for me is the normal thing to do. As long as I don’t have problem to handle them, it doesn’t mind.
“We will close soon, boy,” the security guy spoke to me. “You’re not running away from home aren’t you?”
I only shook my head without words. If I could, I could finish him right on time there, shock him to death. But I’m not in the mood. I took the elevator and went down, left the Tower. I walked to the avenue.
I walked far, passed through the city library, and finally reached the next park. At that time, I heard the animal sounds. I was not far from the zoo. Shock the animal to death sounded fun. Maybe that would make me calm. Animal’s flesh isn’t having the same taste with human’s flesh. Not as good as it.
I zapped to the pool, moved fast through the gate. It’s almost dawn and that place was very quiet like a dead park with only low lighting. I watched the Dolphin Pool. It’s not in the inside and pretty big. I dug down on the other side of the pool. And then I saw a dolphin swim right through me. I put my hands in the water to touch it.
“Do you want me to shock you to death?” I asked the dolphin.The dolphin replied with whistle. It’s not bad talking with the animal. Sometimes I feel like they know what I’m saying. See, animal is not like human. I think they are more mellow compare to them. Well, of course they don’t want me to shock them to death. I asked them a stupid question.
Don't Giva Fuck
| Labels: stress | 0 comments
It`s not about it. OK? Don`t worry about me. And if you could, I think it would be vvv nice to you to stay out of it. I care about you, so please think about your life, your plan and what will you do to yourself for your future. Don`t think about me if you don`t want our healthy minds get hurt.
Do you know? I`m happy. But all of them, one by one they step out from my life cuz I`m not perfect. They don`t even wanna see me as a friend again cuz I left him and choose you. And you must follow their way too, to leave me alone. If you`re not like them, it means you are a stupid bastard. If you could bring back the time where I could grab my little precious in my arms, that would be different. You don`t know how it hurts and I`m pretty much traumatic to start all over again. Do you know what`s on my mind? I want to be alone for the rest of my life. I don`t want anybody but myself. I want to live alone in this world. If I want to fuck, I`ll just go fuck myself. I don`t want control. I`m sick and tired watching you coming around to make me unconscious for your purposes.
I never judge about anything like people did...
And I don`t know it`s true or not to stole someone`s girlfriend...
Saying I`m sorry is not a good solution...
I`m vvvv confuse right know. Vvv fucked up...
And there`s no way to you to understand...
Do you know? I`m happy. But all of them, one by one they step out from my life cuz I`m not perfect. They don`t even wanna see me as a friend again cuz I left him and choose you. And you must follow their way too, to leave me alone. If you`re not like them, it means you are a stupid bastard. If you could bring back the time where I could grab my little precious in my arms, that would be different. You don`t know how it hurts and I`m pretty much traumatic to start all over again. Do you know what`s on my mind? I want to be alone for the rest of my life. I don`t want anybody but myself. I want to live alone in this world. If I want to fuck, I`ll just go fuck myself. I don`t want control. I`m sick and tired watching you coming around to make me unconscious for your purposes.
I never judge about anything like people did...
And I don`t know it`s true or not to stole someone`s girlfriend...
Saying I`m sorry is not a good solution...
I`m vvvv confuse right know. Vvv fucked up...
And there`s no way to you to understand...
Perfect Time
| Labels: my song lyrics | 0 comments
Get it back to the start
and stop to worry
Fire it up today
No more waiting in vain
for the flame just light it
to ease the pain
Feel the high of the sky
and fly fly fly fly
High
Forget about it
Hey you
You need a perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you!)
Take a row, let it go
gotta find where to flow
on a perfect time
On the line
Play your mind to the groove
And all get down
so come on fool around
Feel the high of the sky
and fly fly fly fly
Fly
Forget about it
Hey you
You need a perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you!)
free yourself you have to start
set up
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
and stop to worry
Fire it up today
No more waiting in vain
for the flame just light it
to ease the pain
Feel the high of the sky
and fly fly fly fly
High
Forget about it
Hey you
You need a perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you!)
Take a row, let it go
gotta find where to flow
on a perfect time
On the line
Play your mind to the groove
And all get down
so come on fool around
Feel the high of the sky
and fly fly fly fly
Fly
Forget about it
Hey you
You need a perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you!)
free yourself you have to start
set up
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
Perfect time
On the line
Perfect time
(Yeah you, check it! ugh!)
The Drunkie Philosophy
| Labels: stress | 0 comments
The drunkie said some philosophy comes from his mouth. Nope, that`s not right. No matter his voice seems so convince and trustful or his words sounds very innocent and make sense, he`s a liar. Well, maybe I was wrong about it. I love his sensitive hearing when he`s on drugs. But it doesn`t impress me much. He`s very smart to handle the situation or to make a nice conversation. That doesn`t impress me either. He is a good fucking writer, got a cool musical work too. Still doesn`t impress me thoo. But talking about I`m desperate and crying, I totally agree with him. He`s right. And he`s right again for one more thing. He said that he`s crazy. He is crazy. Now, he`s fucked up anyway. What a big surprise. Maybe he`s happy has me as his slave when he`s high. He always be the winner and put me into uncomfortable things.
It`s his turn to have those problems now. The drugs made him change. I know what`s going on. The day where he tried to stop using it, he hurt him self, cut his wrist with cutter every time, to take the pain away. It doesn`t work for him. He`s down and confuse. He told me that he can`t stop using it. I can`t help him. I don’t want to fall deep with him. I guess he has to find another problem solver to handle his drug problem cuz he`s still addicted. I will always be there for him. I don`t care if people spit on us gay. Ha??? hsuahsuhaushuahushuahsuahuhsuahsuaa
Hang on, my friend. Fuck drugs!!! Sayz hell to Gunja Paradis!!! You`ll be OK…
And don`t forget to not zhakazha!!!
It`s his turn to have those problems now. The drugs made him change. I know what`s going on. The day where he tried to stop using it, he hurt him self, cut his wrist with cutter every time, to take the pain away. It doesn`t work for him. He`s down and confuse. He told me that he can`t stop using it. I can`t help him. I don’t want to fall deep with him. I guess he has to find another problem solver to handle his drug problem cuz he`s still addicted. I will always be there for him. I don`t care if people spit on us gay. Ha??? hsuahsuhaushuahushuahsuahuhsuahsuaa
Hang on, my friend. Fuck drugs!!! Sayz hell to Gunja Paradis!!! You`ll be OK…
And don`t forget to not zhakazha!!!
Rememberal
| Labels: cerpen bahasa inggris | 0 comments
I finally spoke to them with my shape as theirs. It’s very easy to read their mind.
I made 10 rememberall to about what we should do:
- Hide our ship, make it invisible to them
- Act like them, be them
- Do not show our shape to them
- Do not fly above them when they are around
- Do not moult your feathers. I you moult it, destroy it right away
- We can spoke to the animals
- Do not tell them what we are
- Do not kill them if you are not threatened
- Do not make them distrust
- Remain to allert
STUPID REMEMBERALL!
We’re not stupid. If they know something about us or see the something that they shouldn't see, we could vanish their memory easily. As we vanish the on files or datas saved in our wide space. With the note, have you the ability such as those which I intend here? If you’re not, means that the rememberall will hold good to you, so you should do it
I made 10 rememberall to about what we should do:
- Hide our ship, make it invisible to them
- Act like them, be them
- Do not show our shape to them
- Do not fly above them when they are around
- Do not moult your feathers. I you moult it, destroy it right away
- We can spoke to the animals
- Do not tell them what we are
- Do not kill them if you are not threatened
- Do not make them distrust
- Remain to allert
STUPID REMEMBERALL!
We’re not stupid. If they know something about us or see the something that they shouldn't see, we could vanish their memory easily. As we vanish the on files or datas saved in our wide space. With the note, have you the ability such as those which I intend here? If you’re not, means that the rememberall will hold good to you, so you should do it
Step Out
| Labels: my mp3, my song lyrics | 0 comments
I always make the fake about you
I wish I can get thru
I know that you would never find me
Cuz this world is to wide to play
Don't you see the things above you?
(Watch above you!)
Look at the sky and see around you
(Don't you know?!)
The stars would leading me to you
(Even though you never know!)
I'll step out from my place, right away
To get through...
You!
I know I'm far away from you, boy
There's no way to meet you
Besides, you don't even know me
I can't imagine have a soulmate
Don't you see the things above you?
(Watch above you!)
Look at the sky and see around you
(Don't you know!)
The stars would leading me to you
(Even though you never know!)
I'll step out from my place, right away
You!
Get through you!
You!
Through you!
You!
To get through you!
You!
Get through you!
download
I wish I can get thru
I know that you would never find me
Cuz this world is to wide to play
Don't you see the things above you?
(Watch above you!)
Look at the sky and see around you
(Don't you know?!)
The stars would leading me to you
(Even though you never know!)
I'll step out from my place, right away
To get through...
You!
I know I'm far away from you, boy
There's no way to meet you
Besides, you don't even know me
I can't imagine have a soulmate
Don't you see the things above you?
(Watch above you!)
Look at the sky and see around you
(Don't you know!)
The stars would leading me to you
(Even though you never know!)
I'll step out from my place, right away
You!
Get through you!
You!
Through you!
You!
To get through you!
You!
Get through you!
download
????
| Labels: stress berat | 0 comments
I`m still getting ready to move, to a new place. And the new place would be sucks??? I don`t know. But I have checked, my room would be smaller, and there`s no more space to put all my things for sure. There are babies and ill someone (I won`t be play music as loud as I want, that sucks!!!). And there are something on my mind :
- Do I still have the spirit to write any new music?
- Can I go party at night and go home with open door? (cuz I know they regularly close the door at 1 am).
- Can I suck cannabis in my room?
- Can I... * think * fuck!!!
Today I stole money from someone, 1 million...
And, well, I`m so so so sorry. I really need money to pay my debts, so I stole.
Sorry... Life is fucking amazing!!! Whoaaaahsuahsuhaushuahsuhuahsuhaushuahsua
- Do I still have the spirit to write any new music?
- Can I go party at night and go home with open door? (cuz I know they regularly close the door at 1 am).
- Can I suck cannabis in my room?
- Can I... * think * fuck!!!
Today I stole money from someone, 1 million...
And, well, I`m so so so sorry. I really need money to pay my debts, so I stole.
Sorry... Life is fucking amazing!!! Whoaaaahsuahsuhaushuahsuhuahsuhaushuahsua
For Them
| Labels: stress berat | 0 comments
Maybe for you, God created life vvv peaceful and great. Really???
As I know here,
For my Dad, God created life like "I can make my Children to be what I want without understanding their feelings."
For my Step Mom and her Children, God created life like "I`m the Queen/King/Princess/Prince and I am the owner of this world, better than everybody else, and they are nothing but just the low class people. Nothing can`t stop my way to ruin all."
For my eldest brother, God created life so good, "But why I have to deal with other family trouble while my own family live happily day by day?"
For my second brother, God created life like, "Hey, I gotta lotta friends, some of them always take advantages on me, but I don`t mind with that cuz I like them doing that to me, and my wife such a loving one if I do behave like what she wants and giving her much much much money."
For me, God created life so strange and pain in the ass, "Never ending pain, slavery without mercy, locked up, what I want are just dreams, and happiness always taken away from me after I felt it a while and that sucks!!!"
Damn, I`m still working on that fucking hell, today I work 12 AM - 11 PM. SHit!!! I`m vvv fuckin` tired. I prefer to die than continue working there. I just wish to die today, but God... again and again let me live. If I say "FUCK YOU GOD!!!" Will God mad at me? I know excactly, no. God will not mad at me If I apologize, yes. But should I apologize? I think, yes I should. My life become like this just becuz of myself, not just becuz of God. I am the one who make it like this, not God. There is no destiny, you know. And there is no faith. And there is no arrangement from God. Every life is on our own hands, not God hands. Why I said that? Well, becuz... If I want to do what I want, I must have been get some courage to do that. Just like, if I want to escape from my Dad`s cage, to quit being his slave or stop working, I can do it myself with any ways. God will not arrange anything for me about that. It`s all about how brave I decided to follow my own path, but I don`t have guts...
My body is very heavy. I don`t feel anything again today. When I touch my skin, I feel heat. Yesterday I cried, today I`m crying. And I just figure out... I will try to love the feeling when I cry, no matter it is vvv hurt. I will try to like the feeling and I will try to change it as my happiness. Yes, I hope I can do it.
I have another plan. Why if... I don`t eat until I die? Can I do that?
I thought too much about me shoot my head with a gun or me cut my wrist with sharp knife. I`m still afraid if someday I can`t handle my life again and kill myself...
As I know here,
For my Dad, God created life like "I can make my Children to be what I want without understanding their feelings."
For my Step Mom and her Children, God created life like "I`m the Queen/King/Princess/Prince and I am the owner of this world, better than everybody else, and they are nothing but just the low class people. Nothing can`t stop my way to ruin all."
For my eldest brother, God created life so good, "But why I have to deal with other family trouble while my own family live happily day by day?"
For my second brother, God created life like, "Hey, I gotta lotta friends, some of them always take advantages on me, but I don`t mind with that cuz I like them doing that to me, and my wife such a loving one if I do behave like what she wants and giving her much much much money."
For me, God created life so strange and pain in the ass, "Never ending pain, slavery without mercy, locked up, what I want are just dreams, and happiness always taken away from me after I felt it a while and that sucks!!!"
Damn, I`m still working on that fucking hell, today I work 12 AM - 11 PM. SHit!!! I`m vvv fuckin` tired. I prefer to die than continue working there. I just wish to die today, but God... again and again let me live. If I say "FUCK YOU GOD!!!" Will God mad at me? I know excactly, no. God will not mad at me If I apologize, yes. But should I apologize? I think, yes I should. My life become like this just becuz of myself, not just becuz of God. I am the one who make it like this, not God. There is no destiny, you know. And there is no faith. And there is no arrangement from God. Every life is on our own hands, not God hands. Why I said that? Well, becuz... If I want to do what I want, I must have been get some courage to do that. Just like, if I want to escape from my Dad`s cage, to quit being his slave or stop working, I can do it myself with any ways. God will not arrange anything for me about that. It`s all about how brave I decided to follow my own path, but I don`t have guts...
My body is very heavy. I don`t feel anything again today. When I touch my skin, I feel heat. Yesterday I cried, today I`m crying. And I just figure out... I will try to love the feeling when I cry, no matter it is vvv hurt. I will try to like the feeling and I will try to change it as my happiness. Yes, I hope I can do it.
I have another plan. Why if... I don`t eat until I die? Can I do that?
I thought too much about me shoot my head with a gun or me cut my wrist with sharp knife. I`m still afraid if someday I can`t handle my life again and kill myself...
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